Babies.
Babies,
babies, everywhere. Everywhere I look (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.)
someone is announcing their pregnancy. Not that there's anything wrong with
this. I'm at that age where this is normal. Just like when I was 18 and all my
friends were going off to college - I'm now in my mid-to-almost late 20's
(ouch... that hurts so much to say) and all my friends are having babies.
Don't get me wrong. I LOVE babies. They're the cutest. I get SO SO SO excited
when one of my friends announces their pregnancy.
It's just that I am NOT anywhere near ready to have a baby. My husband feels the same way. We would rather wait until 1.) We know where we are going to be in the next couple of years, 2.) We want to be completely done with school, & 3.) We want to be financially READY - Loans paid off, house bought, etc. (Even though I always hear you're never financially ready...). And honestly, I like my Target trips alone. I like my sleep. I like doing things with just Jesse. And if that makes me selfish, then I'm sorry.
I feel like there's something wrong with us because of this. My family has it
in their head that we're never going to have kids.
However, why is it that whenever I see that someone else is pregnant, I feel like someone has kicked me in the stomach? I know that having a baby isn't a competition, but sometimes it really feels like it is. I have this fear that I'm going to wait so long that I'm going to be too old to even try and it's going to be a struggle.
Also, it's annoying that no matter how many times I say I am not ready, if someone sees me pin a bunch of baby stuff or post something on IG, it's all "OMG ARE YOU PREGNANT?" To which I say...
But right now, I am happy just living my life, just me and Jesse,
without worrying about another life. I mean I worry enough. When I have a
child, I'm going to have to be in a permanent self-medicated state or I will
drive myself insane from all the worrying (kidding. maybe).
So friends, I am totally open to watching your babies and loving
and kissing their sweet cheeks.
I'm just not ready for my own yet.
I don't even know why I'm talking about this. I just feel like
it's something that I've been dealing with and I know that other people feel
this way as well.
*LAST NOTE*
Don't ask
someone why they haven't had a baby yet. Just don't. You have no idea what that
person is going through. They could be trying all the time but have no luck.
Some people might have a condition where they can't have a baby. Just be
sensitive. Not nosy. That's all I'm saying.
xoxo.